Cruisin’ In The Slow Lane
Yesterday our friendly “maid”, Errol came and introduced himself (he’s a big, bald guy with a moustache so don’t imagine him in a frilly apron). Errol asked us our preferred time for him to come and plump the pillows and make some towel animals. Foolishly we locked in 9am thinking we’d be up and about by then. Although Jude got up for an early gym session, I was still snoozing when he knocked. Ahh ship life.
In actual fact, Lance (our ship) rocks and rolls almost as much as the bands onboard and I woke feeling a little queasy to say the least. My sea legs are still on their way I hope, but I took a sea sickness tablet for good measure, noting the fine print that warned I might feel a little drowsy.
Jude made it a priority to locate the best coffee on the ship this morning and Starbucks was the best we could do. Could be worse I guess. We had just filled our plates with some delicacies from the breakfast buffet when Jude said: “Daryl Braithwaite, 10 o’clock”. Our first celebrity sighting. Jude boldly and confidently strode up to Dazza at the coffee bar and they chatted, amongst other things, about Byron Bay and the fact that Howzat! was my first ever album. Embarrassingly she mentioned the fact that I had only been 7 years-old at the time). Daryl was lovely. So friendly and non-celebrity-like. He just looked like any other bloke.
I had to have a quick nanna nap after all that excitement. We had pencilled ourselves in for a “Pamper Party” at the beauty salon after lunch. Just what that entailed, we weren’t sure but who doesn’t like a good pampering? Unfortunately by now, the sea sickness tablets had almost put me in a coma and I was nodding like a dashboard bobble head on a dirt road, struggling with all my might to keep my eyes prised open. I’m sure I was even dribbling. Somehow I kept my peepers open long enough to partake in the self-administered pampering, where we got to slather our own faces with various creams and lotions and came out smelling good enough to eat. I decided to keep the pampering going and booked in for a massage with hot stones - sooo relaxing (as if I wasn’t already relaxed enough) and I may or may not have nodded off in the process.
We love the fact that every day, they change a little plate in the floor of the lift to let us know what day it is. If ever we are in doubt, we only have to pop into the elevator and we can be sure. So handy.
We have christened the main Pool Deck area: Bogan Central (aka Bogan Beach). It’s always packed and the beers are flowing from 8 in the morning. The pool is packed from sun=up to sundown and is always a hive of activity. Preferring to have a quiet swim and spa this afternoon, we opted for what we like to call Fake Flower Grotto. (Don’t smell the blooms, you’ll only be disappointed). Fake Flower pool is heated, much quieter than Bogan Beach and it even has a little bit of wave action. There’s always some comedy relief to be found there too - someone fast asleep on a banana lounge, mouth agape, catching flies. Maybe they’ve taken some sea sickness tablets too?
Tonight we were back at the Colonoscopy Club for the Australian INXS Show. The place was packed and we had so much fun. It was just like old times, though the mosh pit was a little tamer than we remembered with a bit more grey hair in the mix. The highlight of the night by far was when the blonde bombshell next to us - the very same girl that had dramatically collapsed in the front row at Mi-Sex, and who obviously hadn’t curbed her enthusiasm for taking full advantage of her unlimited drinks package - was suddenly standing/splashing in a big puddle. Oh no. All the surrounding punters, including us, jumped straight to the obvious conclusion that she must’ve relieved herself. Further investigation, however, revealed the relieving truth, that she’d probably just upended her drink. Phew. Being the practical lass she was, she proceeded to take off her t-shirt - revealing her (revealing) lacy bra - and use it as a mop. Job done, she danced for a few songs in her aforementioned lacy bra, garnering a few shocked expressions and open mouths from stunned onlookers (band members included) before putting the sodden top back on again, without a care in the world.
