Into The Wild
Miraculously everyone was packed and ready by 9am and set to cram into our favourite little buses to hit the open road. Our drivers, Antonio and Ponsiano are doing an amazing job on these impossible roads/tracks, knowing just when to stop for those pesky quadruple speed bumps, dodging oncoming bikes and trucks and safely negotiating the ubiquitous potholes and puddles. We are in good hands.
As we motored west along the “highway” it was a bumpy old ride indeed. Sam and Jacob pulled out their “Bang Bang Chilli” chips and we snacked on chocolate and biscuits as we sang along to classics like Toto’s Africa, The Lion Sleeps Tonight and Can You Feel The Love Tonight? A whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away. Gemma remarked how essential it was to wear a sports bra on these bumpy bus journeys and another of our team, who shall remain nameless, made us chuckle when she said it wasn’t so important for her as her knees could absorb the shock.
Most of our journey was through rural areas with lots of shrubbery, not many trees and long grass aplenty. The landscape here is a lot grassier than I’d expected. We stopped a couple of times at the side of the road for bladders that couldn’t wait. In hindsight, I regret not joining them as the “toilet” at the gate to the national park was beyond disgusting. If the squat toilets at that petrol station had been bad, this was taking bad to a whole new level. There were 2 female toilets and one male one. Delwyn warned me sternly to not even think of entering the door on the left. She had foolishly let her curiosity get the better of her, taking a sneak peek despite being warned of the pending horror waiting behind the door, by a previous occupant. I took her word for it. I decided to brave door number 2. As the door swung ajar to release the nasty, nostril destroying odour, I seriously considered going behind a bush instead. The relatively small drop zone – no bigger than a bread and butter plate – was surrounded by slippery sludge with a stench that could curl the toes of a dead man. Kirsty schooled me in how to hold my nose for long periods of time but alas, I had to breathe during the ordeal and gagging for fresh air, I exited the toilet from hell, feeling like I needed a full body anti-bacterial scrub down.
Passing the pretty Queen’s Cottage, built for Queen Elizabeth, the Queen Mother, when she visited Murchison Falls National Park in 1959, we arrived at our salubrious accommodation in Paraa. Having been to Disneyworld’s Animal Kingdom Park, I’ve realised a lot of Africa feels just like Disneyland. They do Africa almost better than Africa itself. This lodge felt very Disneyesque indeed, with its chocolate brown log railings entwined with jungle vines, its bound-together stick ceilings, rock walls and thatched rooves. There’s a very English looking sitting room with a library and a fireplace where I imagine Dr Livingstone could feel quite at home, smoking his pipe and going over his scientific findings after a hard day exploring the wilds of the African jungle. There’s also a very fancy pool here, complete with a swim-up bar, where most of the team took the opportunity for a refreshing dip this afternoon.
Our guides had arranged for us to go on a safari through the park at dusk tonight. How exciting! Taking our two trusty buses and also a safari van sporting a pop-up roof, we headed out to the savanna, collecting a couple of gun toting rangers along the way. Our binocular clad ranger, whose name was too complicated to remember, kept a keen eye out for any hiding wildlife on the horizon, alerting us when he spotted something to see. Grassy lands, sparsely populated with trees, stretched as far as the eye could see and it was hard to comprehend the vastness of the landscape before us. It was surprising to see so many palm trees but our guide informed us the elephants eat the fruit from the palms and help spread their growth through their dung. There were also cactus plants, acacia trees and my favourite, the sausage tree – a wide canopied tree with large dangling sausage-like appendages swaying in the breeze from its branches. Apparently the elephants like to dine on these snags, causing them to be intoxicated and producing hangover symptoms the next morning. I can imagine the elephants holding their heads in remorse the next day, sorry for indulging in all those sausages.
The giraffes were the easiest to spot, their striking stature making it hard for them to hide. Their majestic frames ran beside us in slow motion, from the darker, older giraffes right down to their gorgeous babies, cantering alongside our open windowed vehicle, our cameras clicking in unison. We also got up close and personal with some Ugandan Cobbs, small deer with bent horns and black stripes down the front of their legs and great herds of noble looking buffalo, their horns merging across their foreheads resembling pigtails with a fringe. We were also lucky enough to see some elephants grazing on the top of a nearby hill, some cheeky baboons and some wily hyenas. Fun fact: elephants can eat between 200 & 300kg of leaves and grass per day! No wonder some of the savanna looked like it had been mown. With not a fence in sight, it was surreal to think this was where these animals actually resided, free to roam the spacious 5000km2 as they please. The Jackson Hartebeest, or African Antelope was in plentiful supply, easily startled with its long face and pointy horns and we got to spy some pretty little birds like the malachite kingfisher, fish eagle and grey crowned crane, who wears an afro and is the national bird of Uganda.
Driving towards the river, we saw a pile of hippos wallowing in the shallows, nestled together like sardines in a can. Cameras poised to snap their faces, none of them lifted its head, leaving us with photos that could be mistaken for big black rocks. You’ll have to take our word for it. Right near the river we were allowed to alight the buses, free to roam amongst the giraffes. It was an incredible experience. It was dark by the time we turned back toward the lodge and in the dusty grey of the early evening we happened to stumble upon a massive group of elephants all marching together with purpose, crossing the road in front of us. We counted at least 30! Too dark to take photos, we all stared open mouthed as this magical procession passed us by, realising we were truly witnessing something very special.
There was just enough time for dinner before an early night in preparation for our sunrise safari tomorrow morning. Can’t wait!
